Modern Lending Podcast | Steve Sims

Do you know anyone that’s worked with Sir Elton John or Elon Musk, sent people down to see the wreck of the Titanic on the sea bed or closed museums in Florence for a private dinner party and then had Andre Bocelli serenade them while they eat their pasta – you will now. Join me as I interview the Modern Day Wizard of Oz and the art of making things happen.

In this snippet of the Modern Lending Podcast...

  • Do you know the reasoning behind your customers why?
  • How to approach our current situation with the pandemic
  • The word "authentic" and  "impossible"
  • Transparency versus Authenticity

Episode Transcribe

[Alec] All ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another Modern Lending Podcast live. I'm so excited that you're joining me now here, YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. Man, I'm so jazzed about this conversation. I had the privilege of listening to this man speak several times. I followed him on social media. I become a huge fan over the years, read his book, we'll get into this. But if you don't know Steve Sims, you're in for a treat. Not only because this guy brings truth and just realness and actual mind blowing shit, he also gives so much of his time and energy to move the narrative forward across so many different industries. And he's also the modern a Wizard of Oz. When you find out what this guy's capable of achieving, I hope it opens up your mind to see what you could possibly do with your life. So without further ado, let's bring on the modern day Wizard of Oz, Steve Sims.

[Alec] What up, Steve?

[Steve] Hey, hey, how you doing? I heard you compare me to an old pervert that hides behind the curtain. So thank you very much.

[Alec] Well, it's on the internet now, so it's real. You can't hide.

[Steve] I know. It's like a thing.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] I remember when I first got quoted, I was thinking, I'm not really sure I like that 'cause he was a fraud. But anyway, we're quickly move across that one.

[Alec] Although he does something very special that people don't recognize, my dad pointed this out to me I didn't realize it, he validates in other people the truth that was always inside them.

[Steve] I'll take that. I'll take that.

[Steve] I like that.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] All right, that's a smart man.

[Alec] Oh man, Steve this is gonna be a fun conversation. Before we kick off, I have a surprise for everybody that's watching now and in the future. At the bottom, you can see there's a text me number which is my text community. And a weekly download which is available alechanson.com or if you just share this video, that's all you gotta do, share it on LinkedIn and Facebook, I'm going to buy you a copy of this book and mail to you for free because I think this book has something of extreme value Steve, for everybody especially in COVID. And I wanna talk about all this stuff, but especially with COVID going on, man, talk about mindset and opening up new ways to see the world, thank you for for this. I really appreciate it.

[Steve] You're welcome.

[Alec] One of the things I first wanna talk about, we've gone digital. We've gone digital in our world because COVID has restricted our freedoms and everything else. Has put all these limitations on everybody. You gotta wear masks and I got my mask with unicorns on it, to let people know what's up. And one of the things you talked about in your book and you talked about frequently when you speak all over the place, is the reality of being real. The power of being real. And you say you don't like the word authentic because it turns into a marketing buzz. And then you throw around the word ugly. But I love this because there are so many people going digital and what they're doing, is they're hiding their true self, in my opinion. And they're putting glamour and glitz on. And I want you to just unpack this. What did you mean when you said this? What do you see for today as local pros and people doing right and wrong? I mean, just open up your insights on this. By the way, if you're live and watching this and you have a comment, question, drop it in, we're gonna answer it. I appreciate you guys. But Steve, let's start with that. Let's start with being ugly.

[Steve] Well, you've actually just shoved me on a pedestal, on my soapbox should I say that. Because you kicked me off with some live and can poke the little things. I hate the word authentic because so many people sit there and they go, oh look at him, look at her, she's so authentic. When you say that someone is authentic, you're acknowledging the rest of the planet is not. And that's terrible. Yeah, that's like me going oh, Alec, look at him, he's breathing. We should be able to take you for kind of the you are, who you are. I have a great belief in being transparent. I want people to be transparent. I want people to be impossible to misunderstand. I want there to be no hidden agenda. I want the transparency and the crystal clarity of why that person is in front of me. Now if I've got that, then I'm educated enough to make a decision as to whether or not what I'm gonna stay. So, I love transparency over authenticity. And that hopefully explains that.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] But you talk about today. The dumb thing is that every digital platform we have also comes with a pile of tools to lie about it.

[Alec] Okay

[Steve] You can go on Instagram. You can take a picture of you on the beach. It's a nice day, but what's the first thing you do? You hit the edit button, you make the sky a little bit blue, and you might see a little bit perfect. You can even get these rub out things to someone down about drunk too pretty. I'm gonna rub them out of my picture. They didn't exist. There's no real. The bottom line if it is, if I go into a pub or if I go into a bar, I've been into a couple in my life, and I walk up to someone, I'm not gonna edit the person I am. I'm not gonna be halfway through the conversation with you Alec and then go oh, sorry, I just messed up my words. Let me walk back here out. And then I'm gonna walk back in again and we'll start that conversation again.

[Alec] Redo it.

[Steve] That's not real life. So, when you've got pictures that are not perfect, they are relatable. And believe it or not, you're spending so much time trying to make a picture perfect picture for your Instagram or something like that, you're actually losing the connection with the audience and the people that are watching it. And as I've already said, well as I've always said in my post into that, perfection is a blue unicorn with three testicles. It doesn't exist. So just keep it real and relatable and you'll keep people for longer.

[Alec] I think that's just a message people need to continue to hear because I don't see it happening. And maybe you can go one step deeper though, Steve because when you talk about being real and showing up as you are and not editing it and really being present, there's a lot of fear that people have. Fear of being judged, fear of not being enough. Fear of all that stuff I think and it's holding people back. How do you deal with that and coach that and experience that?

[Steve] Well, my wife said, I had the superhuman power of ignorance. And so for many, many years, for many, many years, I didn't care. Literally, I didn't care. Then, you do start to worry, you do get concerned and you do the stupid thing. You start to concern yourself with what the other person is interpreting of you. That's a calculation that Elon Musk can't even work out. So don't even start on that. Also social has given us proof that everybody else's life is prettier than ours. You've never ever seen a picture, and please don't do this, you've never seen a picture of anyone on the toilet or picking a spot or opening up a bill or[Steve][Steve]

[Alec] Put Asterix, please don't actually do this.

[Steve] Please don't do this. The Kardashians probably will at some point, they don't care. But that's real life. We know it happens, we know it's real, but we don't show it. So what we do see, is people leaning up against cars that they don't own.

[Alec] Yes.

[Steve] People walking onto jets and doing a selfie. There's 400 people behind them and they just jumped themselves in the first class seat. And then they're told move. But they got the picture first. And so we're being infiltrated with fake[Steve]ness.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] It also intimidates us. And the trouble is, a lot of people now, they don't wanna show up. They are frightened to show up. But when you show up, as the old saying goes, warts and all again, you're relatable, you're real. There's no agenda. But there was a time in my life, that I actually doubted me. Now believe it or not, I've always had piercings, tattoos and no hair. But there was a time when I got concerned. Nine years into doing what I was doing, working with some of the richest, most powerful people in the planet that I literally got concerned and I bought some suits and I bought a car. And I realized, I bought the car to impress you. I was wearing the suit to impress you. I bought a watch that was the price of a new Range Rover to impress you.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] Okay. And it was me. And luckily, I realized it quick enough, got rid of it all, went back to the black T[Steve]shirt and jeans. But when you turn up as you, and when you're prepared go, hey, this is it. It makes the person's decision in front of you, easier. The second you try to twist yourself to get to work with that person to laugh at the jokes that aren't funny, soon as you start doing that.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] That's when you sell yourself out. And if you can't connect with someone in a true real basis then surprise, surprise, I had to break it up, you haven't connected with them at all.

[Alec] I love this message because as salespeople, we become chameleons to a degree over time. Or we're taught build rapport, shadow[Steve]match, use similar language. And all these things and tricks of like the 80s, to line up to somebody and make sure you can get the best impression. And to your point they're hiding their true self. And all of a sudden, when you get around a group of people, they don't know who to chameleon themselves about anymore 'cause now there's too many people to mix with.

[Steve] Yeah.

[Alec] And they don't know how to handle it. And I had a similar experience in my career, I did the same thing. So I resonate with it 100%. And as soon as you find, and there's so much freedom, and just going, this is who I am. And then by the way, guys, it attracts those customers that want that. Which is the ideal customer you want anyway.

[Steve] Yeah, it does. The one thing I realized was, and I saw we got Bill Hart that just jumped on here, I love bill, big shout out to Bill. Soon as COVID's over boy, my house samurai sword, old fashions. And Alec, you'll have to come up 'cause you bought me a fantastic bottle of whiskey. So you have to come up and share that. As soon as you realize the amount of effort, it doesn't take to be you. You've energized to actually work on the client you're dealing with,. When I suddenly found out that it doesn't take any effort to be this good looking, I only have black T[Steve]shirts because I don't have to think, pull a black T[Steve]shirt out. Actually funny enough, my wife was ironing some of my shirts the other day and she went that started look a bit gray, so I got rid of them. And we've ordered four new black T[Steve] shirts. It's just a simple life. No effort, no energy on yourself. That's the way it should be. And Bill's just like that. Bill is Bill wherever he is.

[Alec] Okay.

[Steve] And so it makes it easy for people to look at Bill and go, well, I resonate with Bill, but I don't resonate with Steve Sims. And the beauty, is that that's fine. There's billions of people in the planet. If I only get to work with half a percent of those, I'm doing fine.

[Alec] Yeah. Well, and it's funny too. One of my sayings these days is that everyone has their own unique audience and they're all just waiting for you to show up. Just how people think and how they view the world, there's somebody that wants to hear it from that perspective.

[Steve] Yeah.

[Alec] They wanna hear it from my perspective and I love that. So okay, I wanna pivot a little bit.

[Steve] Go.

[Alec] One of the things that has blown my mind when I first got exposed to you Steve, was just your ability to do things that I thought were impossible. So I want to ask you, do you have a favorite thing that you pulled off for somebody that maybe it never could have been pulled off or they thought or maybe even had your own doubts, even though you probably don't let that show, that oh man, I wonder if I could make that happen? That you actually did for somebody. Married at the Vatican, the Titanic, the story in your book about the journey, the band journey and the guy, how, how does this stuff happen?

[Steve] So can I give you a story?

[Alec] I want one.

[Steve] I was working in moment, you've already mentioned it. I was actually getting a couple married in the Vatican by the Pope.

[Alec] You do.

[Steve] And I was in Rome. And I was there for like six months.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] And one of my clients knew I was in Rome. So he contacted me and he said, I have to go down a Flo. And so I'm taking my fiance and mom and dad. And for anyone that's heard this story, stick with it because there's an ending you may not have heard there's an additional story to answer Alec's question. So, they contact me 'cause he wanted a dining experience to impress his future mother[Steve]in[Steve]law and father[Steve]in[Steve]law. The word experience was in there. So everyone is scared of doing the impossible. I'm scared of giving the client what he asked for. 'Cause the second that you give the client what he asked for, you've completed the transaction. You become a McDonald's drive through, you become Amazon. If you don't think Amazon is a transactional service, phone him up and asked him what's the best toilet while you should be buying this week? They can't do it. Okay. So, I created, and I'll skip through, I created an experience by always, always, always starting at the top. And even if I fail, I finally exceed what the client asked for. So I tried to get the academia to Galleria, which is the museum, Florence's museum that houses Michelangelo's David. I gave them the idea of having a dinner set up for six people at the feet of Michelangelo's David to create the world's greatest Italian meal. And I don't know.

[Alec] So I had my 10th anniversary with my wife in Italy. And I've been in this museum. I stood right where this table stood. I know what you're talking about. So keep going.

[Steve] So I got them to close the museum at three o'clock in the afternoon, kick everyone out. Give it to me an entire museum until two o'clock in the morning. And I had a table of six at the feet of Michelangelo's David, a string quartet, a piano. And then halfway through, the pasta, I brought in Andrea Bocelli, the serenade, and while they were finishing their meal. Okay. Now, that's wonderful. But I wanna skip to something else that happened that night that actually has been more impactful on my life. So I was dealing with the top people, the biggest supporters, the biggest sponsors of this museum that were making some phone calls to get me the credibility to get the museum shut down.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] There was a curator in there. Now the curator is on payroll. He's looking at every piece of art as his baby. He understands every single nuance to every single piece in there. And there's this guy in a black T[Steve]shirt with an eyebrow piercing, and tattoos, wandering in with a fancy dancy client that doesn't understand it. You can imagine the curatories, less than happy about me being there. But his bosses are telling him, you look after Mr. Sims. So here's the story. Every time I needed anything, everyone else was Yes, yes, yes.

[Alec] Yep.

[Steve] He gave me attitude. He gave me friction. He was always I will see. I knew you had to do. So don't tell me you're gonna see, get it done. I didn't say that. But he gave me friction. He wanted it to be clear in his tone that he didn't really wanna be working with me. So in the evening, before my client was gonna turn out, which was nine o'clock, Andrea Veronica, Veronica's his wife, and Andrea Bocelli's son was the pianist, was the full Bocelli family there.

[Alec] Incredible.

[Steve] Yeah. Oh, it was. It was one of my favorite events I've ever done, okay. While Andrea is, and this is what they were doing, they would sing a bit.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] And then move the piano about 10 feet to make sure there was no reverb, or any kind of echo. Okay. And then of course, when you move a piano, you're gonna retune the bloody thing again. So they were dance this piano all around in front of the, or slightly to the left of David, to get the best sound. While this is going on, I'm leaning up against a column, looking at the beautiful table setup, okay. Looking Andrea, checking out his tone and his vocal cords, looking at his son playing around a piano, chatting with Veronica, chatting with a few of the other people that are there. The curator is leaning against the other wall, okay. Watching it as well. He had given me friction for about 72 hours. And this is where the little prick in me came out, the selfish little bastard. I thought to myself, I'm gonna give them a little bit of a dig. I'm gonna be a bully. And for anyone out there going, well, that's rude, that's all. Yes, it is. But it came out in me. My little evil monster came out and I just wanted to give him a little jab, just let him know that hey, you tried to give me friction, but I still got this pulled off. So I called him and he turned around and I said come here, come here. So he came over, arms crossed, not wanting to have anything to do with me. Not wanting to post friends or anything like that. And he's got his arms crossed and he's looking very Italian, very dapper, very sharp. Again, I'm in a black T[Steve]shirt and jeans. And he's looking at all of this. So he said to me, look at that, Andrea Bocelli. Just warming up. That's pretty incredible, isn't it? And without looking at me, went yes, yes, it is, it is. I said look at that table. That table had the candelabras on there and it was just beautiful gold, silk tape. It was a beautiful spread, as you would expect for something to this standard. Just probably $100,000 table, just in the names on it.

[Alec] Yeah, oh my.

[Steve] I'm like, look at that table. He's like, it is beautiful. It's beautiful. I said, look, this is all at the feet of Michelangelo's day. We got Andrea Bocelli and a meal. Can you believe that? And he's like, no, no, no. And I was getting all of the affirmations out there. And I thought, keep them coming 'cause I'm just about a slap you in the Tuesday. So I turned around and I said to him, so I wonder how come I was able to pull it off. And this was where I was expecting him to go because no one's as connected as you Mr. Sims. No one's as smooth and debonair. I just wanted him to eat. And I was like, come on, come on. Little bastard just turned around. He went, no one's ever lost. I was floored, it absolutely killed me. And I was like, oh. But it got me thinking. The trouble is, as soon as you put the word impossible in any conversation, you've already allowed yourself never to achieve it. It's impossible for me to do a four minute mile. It's impossible for me to lose weight. It's impossible for me to get someone married in the Vatican by the Pope. I've never used the word impossible. And the second you do, you own up to the point he never gonna achieve it. When he told me this and to complete it a bit, I think he realized he'd killed me. And that was the first time I bloody saw him smile a little bit. We actually went out afterwards. And we are actually dear friends. I was supposed to visit him at his home this year but it couldn't happen. So he got the one up on me there. But when I came back to the States, I found out the people in Pentagon, I found out the people that worked within Harvard, all these different things. And I said to him, hey, I'm just catching up. We're having fun. I wanted to ask him, why did this happen? And every single one of them turn around said, well, nobody's ever asked or we'd never been requested to do this or you were the first one ever came to. And it suddenly made me realize that my ignorance had never allowed me to put that word impossible in there. So if you do, and I love it 'cause people come to me and they go, oh yeah, I wanna do this Steve but it's impossible. And to myself it's unachievable.

[Alec] Yep.

[Steve] Okay. In your mind, it can't be done. That's not my mind.

[Alec] See, this is what I want people to hear right now because Steve we're in this environment where we're feeling things are impossible. I can't do business the way I used to do business because COVID has restricted this or it's too hard or now I can't do this. Or I can't get on video and build digital influence because that's some millennial thing and I don't understand it. It's too hard, or it's impossible. And your mindset throughout this entire book, "The blueFish Mindset," is that, it's not impossible. And exactly what you just said remove the word. We're 20 minutes in and some people are just probably joining now. And there's this thing at the bottom of the screen right there that says, text my community number or join the weekly download on alechanson.com or just share this video to bring impact into somebody else's life. And I'm going to mail you a copy of blue fishing for free. Just mail it to you 'cause this book has nuggets like this all throughout it. And so Steve, what else can you share on this topic of impossible 'cause there are people right now whose mindsets are struggling. And by the way, as you probably know, there's loans falling from the sky. And so there's record low rates. There's some crazy, fulfillment and capacity issues across our industry. So there's a lot of distraction. And that distraction is stopping people from doing the things they know they should be doing. And they're formed around their excuses.

[Steve] I'm gonna call out bullshit, okay. And I'm actually gonna put my hands up and say, COVID is one of the best things has ever happened to us. Okay. And people are gonna be like, oh, you can't be saying that. Well sorry, honey just did. The bottom line of it is, we're pissed off now. And as you say, we're distorted, we're distracted, we're confused, we don't have clarity. We don't have any of these things because when will COVID be over? And what's COVID done to us? It's done one thing, stopped us connecting with other human beings. Rates are low, I still need a home, my lights are still go on. I still wanna chat with people but I can't connect with people. Well, I hate to break your bubble or rain on your parade. But we started this shit in 2000 when we invented Friendster and Myspace. We've been socially distancing since the early 2000s. And now it's just come to a head. And I'm pleased as fuck, that you hate missing it. I want people, when COVID's over, to suddenly realize that, hey, I'm the one that's been distancing myself away from true connection. I'm the one that's been filtering my pictures a little bit more to make myself look a little bit more appealing, and pretty. I'm gonna come back and I'm going to, for the first time, in probably 20 years, I'm gonna show up. And this is gonna be me. If it loses me clients, they weren't clients. They were paychecks, okay. So I want people to be irritated now on what you're missing. I want you never to forget this pain. And I want you to focus on connecting. Now the tough thing is, we're missing out on it now but it's not gone. And Bill Hart will be able on quote you on this. I have found very creative ways because we're creative people. See Amazon doesn't think, create and dream. It transacts.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] The second, as Dave Savage says, we've gotta do everything Amazon does and everything it doesn't do. And that is, create, disrupt, design, dream, desire. We've gotta be able to do this. If you use those brain cells, you can still find creative ways to connect with people. And I'm all about connect.

[Alec] Let's talk about a creative thing I saw on social that you did. Let's talk about Christmas cards in July.

[Steve] Of course.

[Alec] I saw you do this, I saw it. And I was like, what is he doing?

[Steve] The daft thing is, we are all gagging for the connection.

[Alec] Okay.

[Steve] Yeah. We are all desperate to get out and connect with people. So we've got our arms out, wanting it. Now here's the dumb thing, have you noticed your TV adverts are really bad at the moment? Because all of the advertisers are scaling back. Well, hang on a minute. People wanna receive warmth, understanding, connectivity. Well they want you to solve their problems. Yet the rest of the planet has decided, it's a bad time to advertise. That is an oxymoron, I can't get my head around. If people are looking at connecting now, surely we should be doubling down on the ways that we do it.

[Alec] Yeah.

So one of the things that I did and you never ever do what is expected, they'll never light up anyone's toes. So what I did was, and I've done this for a few years, I've done this for about six years actually. I sent out Christmas cards. Now, here's one little tip for ya. I bet you didn't know this but Christmas cards in July are actually cheaper than they are in December.

[Alec] Well it's shocking

[Steve] Shocking, isn't it? I knew that was gonna blow people away. So I saved my ass and actually being able to buy 250 Christmas cards. And then what I did, was I wished in the card, just simply Bill, Merry Christmas, Steve and I posted it. Now the beautiful thing is how many fingers does it take to delete an email? One, all right.

[Alec] And it's no filter that gets deleted.

[Steve] All right. How many fingers does it take to open up an envelope?

[Alec] Yeah, you use your whole hand.

[Steve] You use your whole hand or both hands?

[Alec] Well, yeah, you gotta hold it. And then you gotta flip it or drive a knife through it.

[Steve] Now, it's like holding a steaming wheel, isn't it? I've got your total bodily commitment. You can't be drinking a cup of coffee while opening up my envelope. You physically can't do it. I do this on stage and you always get someone go, who takes one and I give him an envelope and I go, there you go, open that with one finger. Yeah, watch him look a little bit like I can't use the words I wanna use but they look a bit stupid. So the bottom line of it is, I sent out Christmas cards in July.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] People were compelled because Christmas card usually come in square envelopes. Anything that has a square envelope is an invite. Psychologically, we always recognize it, it's an invite, okay? If it's got a window box on it with your name perfectly typed, it's a bill. But if it's handwritten and it's square, you think it's an invite, the anticipation, the excitement. How many of you out there get excited whenever Amazon drops off a box?

[Alec] Oh, the dopamine hit? Right, absolutely.

[Steve] You know it's know a fricking toilet duck, so I'm block your sink. 'Cause you bloody ordered it. But you're still excited when you're ripping open that box, and go, hey, great, I've, great, got me tampons, excellent. And you got a little excited. So when you get that envelope, you don't know why it's there, but you recognize it as anticipation. You recognize it as an invite, then you recognize it with Christmas. These are all triggers that make you smile 'cause everyone smiles on their birthday, for an invite. Getting a special little gift, Christmas Day. You saw, I've got you smiling. And then what I did, was I used a QR code that send you to a video. And then this video, it was like, hey, I wanted to get you that card because I wanted to be the first one to get your Christmas card this year. That's how special you are. So they got me, but then I went into why I sent it. And how is a marketing ploy? You should be doing it with all your people. So not only did I do something to make you smile, which you won't forget. Come Christmas, how many of my people are gonna think, well Steve got there first?

[Alec] Yeah

[Steve] I've had people in past years actually save that and put it on their mantelpiece and gone, well Steve was the first one I got this year 'cause it was in July. So the bottom line is I've sent mugs, I've sent little. I sent out a lot of little booklets. And these booklets had great ideas I've had while I've been drunk. Or stupid ideas, okay, I love that one. 'Cause all ideas, staff are stupid, just before they're genius. So yeah, I would send out these little books and I'd go look, what else have you got to do today other than binge watch Netflix or come up with some stupid ideas that are gonna change the world. And so you're showing your care. And the dumb thing is, these pads that were like $9 posted. Okay. Because it's COVID and everyone wants to make money. I was getting them at $3 a piece, including postage.

[Alec] Hey Mikey, throw up the link to the Facebook community. So Steve, one of the things you do is you host a community on Facebook

[Steve] I do.

[Alec] And talk about it because I'm a part of it. I think it's a great way to add value to the world. What's your intent with this group?

[Steve] To make you smarter, make you more impactful and get you out of your own way. We came up with this group. It's free of charge, no promoting, no selling. No negativity, no bullshit. And what we do is, we go in there and I talk about, hey, I'm trying this program at the moment for my LinkedIn messages. So I reveal all the technology that I'm trying and if it works, or it doesn't work. And so I think next Wednesday and again it's free of charge, if everyone jumps in there and just registers for that group, and then we'll approve you, we're actually doing a live AMA next, I think it's Wednesday, where I'm actually going through the results of what me sending out 250 Christmas cards did and the back end. The actual dashboard of all the stuff that people don't realize I've been able to accumulate by sending out these things. It looks funny and looks quirky but the data you can grab today is almost scary. And I reveal what I do. And so this is a way of being able to go, hey, I'm trying this, really works, for you to be able to try it with your people, and you can. Just imagine, if all the people you were working with and all the prospects, you sent out a Christmas card. They would be shocked, they were confused, okay. But a confused mind is receptive to the next message you give it. And though if it's one thought connection and just to say, hey we're in strange times. What's stranger than a Christmas card in August? Enjoy yourself.

[Alec] I saw people putting up their Christmas lights. Real Christmas lights.

[Steve] Why not? Why not? We just have fun, yeah.

[Alec] Well Steve, you said something profound that I think isn't gets skipped over 'cause you said a lot of profound things today. So thank you by the way. My texts are blowing up. I guess I have to close down my podcast after this. So you're the final guest 'cause I can't go up any higher, so this is it. Thanks for that. Boom.

[Steve] Well have you heard Bill Hart yet?

[Alec] Yeah, yeah, Bill was last week.

[Steve] Oh, well there you go, yes, I'm surprised. I miss after after warm up art. I was warm up.

[Alec] But here's what you said, you said every idea starts out stupid until it's cheap. And some of the things you were talking about in your group is just you're trying this, you're doing this, you're experimenting with this. And you talk a lot about that in your book too. But so many people are afraid to try something stupid in fear of looking stupid.

[Steve] I'm gonna name drop these annoyed people. But that's what I do. A few years ago, I was doing a private tour. This was pre[Steve]NASA. A private tour of Elon Musk's SpaceX down in Hawthorne, okay. I had 60 of quite simply the richest people in the planet. They own telecoms, they own gas companies. They are head of Rise and all of these people, will come along to this event. And I was taking Elon to meet the crowd. But I had two of my clients with me and they wanted to walk with me so they could walk with Elon Musk.

[Alec] Yeah.

[Steve] One of them was happily quiet, just happy to be walking down through SpaceX with Elon Musk. The other one who was a little child at Justin Bieber concert that just wanted to get into a conversation with Elon Musk for any reason and was like, so when do you do that? What do you think about it? The guy's a billionaire but he was just busting a guy over Elon Musk. And he turned around, and again, this was pre[Steve]NASA sign in SpaceX, okay. And NASA at the time, if you recall, were actually publicly dissing Elon.

[Alec] Oh yeah, I remember.

[Steve] Saying that there's no space for the public sector in space.

[Alec] Yep.

[Steve] This is a government agency, know your lane was one of the things that they said, okay. 'Cause he was into Tesla cars. And so my client turned around and I don't know why, he was just trynna get a conversation going. And Elon's not very conversational if much about him he's not.

[Alec] No.

[Steve] So my client turned around and go, oh, what about NASA? NASA, publicly Disney. Are you bothered about that? Elon didn't even look at him. But I remember these words. Elon, turned around and said, they will always laugh at you before they applaud. And that was the only thing he said. And I was like, damn, that's good. And the amount of people that I know, Ray Kurzweil, Peter Diamandis, people that have done shockingly brilliant things that were openly mocked, seconds before it was revered as genius.

[Alec] Man, I hope everybody hears them. 'Cause it's the truth. Now, Steve, you also have a distillery program that you invite people in to go one step deeper with you. And there's a link down I'm gonna put on the screen too 'cause it's fast. Not only you giving away free stuff, but then you have a deeper dive which I think is amazing. What's your vision for this, for your distillery program?

[Steve] What it seems distillery is basically you commit I commit. So I wanna help people out in the Facebook group. I get in there as much as I can but there seems to still be

[Alec] You're in there all the time. You're dropping value all the time.

[Steve] And I liked it. And I believe today, I believe today, we need to, we need that support. And we're all creative disruptors 'cause if you're not disrupting, you're being disrupted. And so COVID isn't hey, COVID is a sport, would you like to come and play bolocks? You're in the game.

[Alec] Playing.

[Steve] You're playing. It depends on how you play or whether you go and cry your eyes out on the bench. We're in this game. The bell's been called and we're running around chasing that ball. We need as much support as we can get. So the Facebook group gives that support. The Sims Distillery, you get me. So I actually bring in my experts. The Jeffrey Madoff's, the J. A. Graham's. I got Jim Quick coming up, I got Joe Polish. I got some Billie Jean, Dan Fleischman has been in there. So we do live AMA's in there, which just like this, you guys actually get to ask like the producer of Victoria's Secret and ruffle in, how best to build up a video using your iPhone. And you get asked the most amazing things. Tucker Max, how can I do a book? Jim Quick, how can I rehearse and get keep my mind smarter? All of these things, you get to converse with these people. So Sims Distillery is my way of asking you to commit and when I get people commit and walk in there, then I unload everything. And everything that I do that, I don't tell everyone about, I tell everyone in Sims Distillery.

[Alec] I wanna go here, Steve. We're coming closer to the 40 minute mark. I know you have a lot of stuff. And I know you're heading to Vegas and you got your tact.

[Steve] On a motorbike.

[Alec] This is where I wanna land the rocket ship we've been on. 'Cause we hit so many powerful conversations that could turn into hours of discourse in the 36 minutes we've been talking. But this is where I wanna come in. Because you've said some really core stuff about the desire we have to connect with other human beings. And then in your book as someone comes to you and talks to you, you ask three why's. And I love that as the final conversation piece. And by the way, if you're in the comments and you wanna ask Steve something, he's here, then do it. If you're watching this in the future, sorry. But if you're watching it, now you can ask him a question. But you asked three whys and I think that's a really great conversation too. How do we create better connection with others.

[Steve] And I can also give you a perfect story about it as well from a realtor client that I was coaching. And we actually went into the why section for her future in her business. I believe you tap into your inner Sherlock, okay. So when someone comes to you and they ask you a question, nine times out of 10 I was gonna say 10 times out 10, so I'll stick with that. 10 times out of 10, people are scared to tell you what they really want.

[Alec] Yes.

[Steve] They diluted it a little bit so they don't sound silly. And so they will pull back a little bit. If you ask someone, hey, you won a billion dollars, what would you do this weekend? They'll be like, oh, I'll get a mansion and Lamborghinis. And I'd have a hot tub party with Hawaiian Tropic girls. It's a knee jerk reaction. If you say to them, okay, six months later, what would you do? They may repair their old school. They may do something for their old persons home that mum was in. You're now you get into the core of the reason. So I had this realtor that contacted me. And she said that, I need to talk to you about a very difficult client, okay. Didn't never really difficult clients that difficult conversations or difficult understandings. So I said, okay, walk me through it. So she said that they have come to her and they wanted a three bedroom property on the street.

[Alec] Okay.

[Steve] And I said, fine. So, what did you do? She said, well, I gave him every one that was available. I said, so you just, basically just totally showed him with everything. There you go. And she went, well, they wanted this. So I gave them this. And as I said, at the beginning this podcast, never give what the person asks for. Give them what they desire, lust and need, okay. So I said, did you ever dare to ask the client, why? They go, oh no, no, no. Now the funny thing is, why is still today one of the most confrontational rude words out there. And I love it. People say, hey, Steve, I'd love to take you out for a drink, I go why? I wanna know why. It's not supposed to be rude, but I wanna be educated. So I said, what do you wanna do is, 'cause none of the properties will lighten our bells, go back to the client and say, hey, I've sent you one of these things. Let's go back, you wanna be in this area? She said, yeah, yeah, yeah. She said, why? Not what you're looking for, why do you wanna be in this area?

[Alec] Yep.

[Steve] It turns out, that she grew up about 10 miles away. And back when she was growing up, this street was where all the movers and shakers lived. And her mum used to drive her down the street going, oh if I won the lottery, this is where I'd moved to. So subconsciously, this woman wanted to complete that. Now we all know The IT[Steve]Street of 20 years ago maybe he's looking a bit ragged around the rings now and is the new area where the upper go. So, what she was looking for was an arrival of her now status rather than a zip code. So she had to reframe what the desire was. And I've got one that may make you cry 'cause sadly it makes me cry every single time. I'll try not to and I'm thankful this is a podcast and no one can see it in any case.

[Alec] Oh, they're seeing it, the video too, they're gonna see you cry.

[Steve] Oh bollocks, I'm gonna turn the camera off.

[Alec] Yeah, turn the camera off

[Steve] I had a client of mine, sorry, rephrase that. I had a gentleman contact me. He was not a client, never became a client. And this year 2020, I finished my last year working with Elton john. And so I'd have a long relationship with him in like I eight years. And this guy contacted me. He said, hey, I want to go to Sienna. I want John's Oscar party in Hollywood and I wanna meet Elton john, I wanna get a picture. So I said tomorrow, that's great. Why do you wanna do that? And he went, well, he's an icon, he's brilliant. He's one of the last living legends. And he's gonna die soon, so I wanna make sure I get a photograph with him. That was it. So I said, oh, that sounds great. Let me see what they say and I'll come back to you. And of course, I did him. A month later, we got a phone call come into the office and one of my girls grabbed him. And she put it through to me and she said, this sounds like that guy that phoned up a month ago. I got a funny idea this is me trying to get it because you blocked him wouldn't come back to him. She said and I don't know how to handle it. I went, put it through to me. So we all believed that this was a mate of the other guy.

[Alec] Yep.

[Steve] Okay So this guy gets in the phone and say, hey, how you doing? Same enthusiasm. And you usually have that enthusiasm when you asking for something to overcome the embarrassment of either not getting it or someone laughing at what your dream is. I so I'm used to that psychology there. So the guy is like, hey, yeah, yeah, I'd love to get a photograph with Sir Elton John. I said, oh, that's great. Why? And as Chris Voss says, I always go into my midnight DJ, why do you want that? You calm it down. So he goes quiet for a bit. The other guy didn't. So this guy does, goes quiet and he says, still quiet, well, he's a legend, he's great, he's fantastic, he's an all star icon. These things.

[Alec] There's things.

[Steve] Yeah. It was the tone of voice and it was the, there's things. So I said to him, tell me about those things. Again, goes quiet. And then he says this, he says when I was a kid, my dad used to take me to school. And he used to pick me up from school, never missed a day. It wasn't my mum's thing, it was my dad's thing. Me and my dad, every single day of my school, all the way through into high school before I got a car, he would take me to school, take me back from school. And the first car that we had, had a cassette jammed in there. We couldn't eject it, but it was Elton john. And we used to sing out on John on the way to school. We used to sing out on John on the way back from school. And when he got a new car, it had a CD player. And he bought Elton John's greatest hits. And we used to sing Elton John there and Elton John, never anything else. He said, even in my teen years going into school, even when I refused to sing, I would stare out of the world, I stare out the window with dire embarrassment. My dad will be singing his lungs out to Elton John on the way to school, on the way back, never ever failed. He said my dad's been dead about 20 plus years. When I'm driving to a meeting and Elton John comes on the radio, for the next three minutes my dad sat next to me. And I wanna say thank you to him for bringing my dad back for three minutes every now and then. Now when I heard that, there was nothing I could do. We got him to meet Elton John. He went out I can see your eyes there Alec, don't make out your top, I can see him welling. I introduced them to, and I'd already told him the story, they hugged it out and the guy told Elton and it was everyone around, big and small, we were blabbering. It was such a perfect, why? That it could be achieved. If we hadn't have got to that why, I may have dissed him off like the first guy and he would have never been able to tell everyone how proud he was for bringing his dad back alive.

[Alec] Steve, thank you for going into this part of the conversation as we get to the end of this because there are so many mortgage professionals right now as interest rates are so low and loans are falling from the sky that they're not asking the why's, they're becoming order takers. And they have a chance in their career to ask the three why's. And not only differentiate themselves from everybody else who just throwing rates out and interest rates out, but to make human connection with a customer that could be their customer, let alone their friend, for the rest of their career in mortgage. And I love the stories of the why's. That Elton John's story is intense. But I think it's the right way to end this because that's how you make life meaningful even as a mortgage sales guy. You tap into the why of the people you're serving. And you can make huge impact.

[Steve] If you are asking the why with your client and then solving the problem that they have, how ready are they gonna be to actually refer you to someone that's now got that same problem? If you offer a transaction, if a new company comes up tomorrow, called Bing Bong. And it sells toilet Mo and everything else Amazon does, for one cent cheaper, how loyal are you gonna be to Amazon? You're not. 'Cause Amazon has only ever done a transaction with you. You're gonna go wherever the thing is that you can get just as easy, but cheaper. There's no discount in the price. Now I've always said, if you find yourself arguing over the price, that's because you've failed to demonstrate the value. None of the stories I've given you, none of the times I've told you about my clients, none of the times as a client ever, ever, ever welshed on the amount of money it was gonna cost them. Because I demonstrated the value that made demonstrate a bargain to them, straight off the back, because I went in to the core and to the why.

[Steve] Yeah. Brother, I know you gotta big day ahead of you. I know you got a big bike ride ahead of you, out in the desert.

[Alec] Yeah. For those of you guys that are getting value from hanging out with Steve today, just know that he's in his Facebook community. He's in his distillery. He's given this value all the time to everybody around him. Steve, thank you for all you do my friend.

[Steve] It's been a pleasure. Thanks for having me. And all you people out there, be good and do something different.

[Alec] Ladies and gentlemen, if this brought you value, share, text me or join the weekly download on alechanson.com and I'm gonna mail you this book. Steve, God bless my friend. And that's it.

[Steve] Thanks buddy.

[Alec] That's the Modern Lending Podcast, I'll see you guys, next week.

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